Hadrian's Wall

A few weeks ago I did a charity walk along Hadrian’s Wall with my Dad and his wife.
It was hard work going up and down the Northumberland hills for 8 to 10 hours a day sometimes in the rain, sometimes in the sun.
And then dinner in a marquee with plastic chairs and camping on cold, hard floors were not exactly the best way to get ready to go back for more. But me, my dad and his wife were always there for each other with a hug and mug of hot chocolate too!
And you know what it, it felt good to do something.
It felt good to be outside.
It felt good to be a tourist in my own country.
It felt good to share something other than phone calls with members of my immediate family.
It felt good to do more in 48 hours than I would normally do in weeks.
(You never know how much you can push yourself until you have to).
But most of all it felt good to – no matter how much it hurt – to just keep on putting one foot in front of the other.

When I got back a couple of friends – completely separately but simultaneously – mentioned that they might go live abroad. One to Canada, another to Mexico, another might move to Hong Kong for work and a couple might go to Australia.
It all sounded so amazing so like rats on a sinking ship I started to wonder if there was something wrong with living in London.
One of my mates said I should come with her and I said I didn't want to leave London. For a long time afterwards I wasn’t as convinced as I had sounded!
London is tough, polluted and expensive and it’s nowhere near the countryside or the coast. Other places might be cleaner, safer, warmer have better economies and be more picturesque too.
Why don't I want to leave if everyone else does?
Why don't I want a new adventure?
Where has my adventurous travelling mindset gone?
I said I would only live in London 5 years and that was 6 and half years ago maybe it is time to think about moving on?
I started thinking maybe it's about more than just the location...

When you are writing they say your location should be like another character.
So my play about the Burnley race riots is not just about Burnley it’s about a place that exists where tolerance and integration totally failed a whole community.
I’m also writing a short film set in a prison and it’s not just about being in a prison it’s about a place inside you where good and evil aren't as easily defined.
So if it’s not just geography but more like psychology I started to think about not just where home might be but what home means to me.

And I think home is living in your own skin and bones and feeling comfortable with that.
All of my mates who are totally comfortable in themselves have that reflected back by the place they live.
The ones who feel like a square peg in a round hole are always thinking about where to go next.
It's weird, I think you only feel comfortable in your own skin by growing up.
You only grow up by moving further along the road that you have put yourself on.
And I think it's only when you move along the road your on do you find the place you call home.

With some people I know it isn't where they live that is the problem it's the road to where they're going that is.
They don't know where that is so they are going all around the country or even the globe to find it. They are dating everyone and no-one at the same time, they are changing hobbies or jobs more often than sheets on their bed, they are essentially running away because they don't know where they want to go.
We seem to be a generation completely unafraid of globe-trotting but totally petrified to say where we really want to go.

If my friends do move away then I will completely support their decision to do so as long as it’s what they want in their heart of hearts.
Maybe home will be on the other side of the world for them; I'm not saying that it won't be or that they shouldn't go. I'm just saying sometimes the easiest way to find home is not to look outward across the horizon; it's to look inwards at your soul.
Look at who you are, what you want and what you are willing to do to make it happen.

Pick a road and start walking.
It might be the wrong road, but it’s not a life sentence.
It might go in the opposite direction to where you thought it might go but it’ll probably be better than standing still.
I don’t want to leave London because I can see where I am going.
I get annoyed when I don’t think I am going to get there, or am not getting there fast enough. But I am on my way somewhere. And that somewhere is right here.
It’s hard work, it takes sacrifices, dedication and discipline but, no matter how hard it gets, I just keep putting one foot in front of the other.
If I did it on those hills in Northumberland hills I am pretty sure I can do it here!

I would be nothing without my friends so if I could say anything to help them I’d say walk far, walk tall and walk to places you have never been to before or ever dreamed you would go to.
But if you do nothing else just keep walking...hopefully you will find you’ve walked all the way home. And wherever you end up I will try my very best to be there for you...with a big hug and mug of hot chocolate too!