Evolution Underground

After a night out last week for a friend's birthday I found myself on the tube heading home, admittedly quite tipsy at this point, discussing evolution.
Not monkey-into-man type discussions, more along the lines of how as a single seasoned londoner you evolve, sometimes without even knowing it.
Take my man pal for example - I have known him 8 years and in that time I have seen him evolve into a kind, wise man full of passion and patience.
Not that he wasn't any of those things to begin with and not that he isn't still as much fun after two bottles of Sauvignon Blanc as he ever was...but it just seems like both his head and heart have a greater capacity to be true to himself than they did before.
The passing of almost a decade since I met him has brought about many things that I never would have dared to predict, a few things I wish I could change but also more good times than I can even begin to remember - and a fair chunk of them involve him, or at least countless messages to his voicemail shouting "I'm by the speaker on the left - where are you?".
I know at times he's taken flak for being my mate and I'm grateful that he never let it alter our friendship, so that no matter what we were always able to talk a lot, laugh a lot and usually do those things whilst drinking a lot too.
The one thing we've never been able to do is be anything other than completely honest with each other.
That's why on a recent random Monday evening I found myself attempting to dispense relationship advice to him and trying to explain all this to him in a far less articulate way.
It sort of came out as "you're the same person but also you're a different person, you know?".
I don't think it made much sense to him at the time or to me actually until I heard someone say that as a writer, you have to make growth your ultimate goal.
At first I thought they meant that perhaps you should aim to grow by shaping your writing into what people want but what they actually meant was the opposite, that to truly evolve with your work you have to stay true to yourself and keep doing your best. If you do you will grow with your work and if you send that out into the marketplace then it will respond eventually.
In other words, keep giving them you until you is what they want.
I run the risk of descending into a 'to thine own self be true' cliche moment but I think the two conversations are linked and when I realised that I felt relieved.
My mate has grown into a stronger person beacause he has asked himself what he wants out of life and has been dedicated and determined to finding the answer.
Writing can be inspiring, frustrating, satisfying, challenging, scary and crazy all at once.
As a wannabe writer I constantly feel like I don't know what I'm doing and I keep expecting it to get easier but it doesn't.
As a single Londoner I feel like things are the same as they have always been but are also completely different too and I sometimes wonder if that'll ever get any easier too.
Growth never stops so neither should you.
Keep writing, dating, talking and laughing.
Keep giving them you until you is what they want.